Favorite Moments in Film

Still think this is one of the scariest scenes ever...

My Problem with Indian People (Part 5 of a 500-part series)

They are never on time. Ever. I'm not exaggerating, they just suck at being places at the appropriate or agreed-upon time. If they make a reservation for, let's say, 8:00pm, I can guarantee you that they won't be there before 8:30, 9:45 at the latest, and complain about there not being a table or the restaurant closing, after trying to contact them 3 times. If there is a party that starts at a certain time, they will arrive at least an hour late, and complain about the food being cold or something else as ridiculous. Just remember, if you're ever meeting an Indian person anywhere, be there at least 40 minutes late, so for once they'll know what it's like to have their time wasted instead of yours.

Why We Aren't Friends With Our Neighbors

Neighbor Lady Person: (Walking by) Wow, you sure you got enough beer there? (on the 20 extra cases of Indian beer we keep in the garage for the restaurant)

My Mom: Well, probably not since we're all alcoholics.

Neighbor Lady Person: Oh, that's... nice.

My Mom: Well, it is until the fighting starts.

Neighbor Lady Person: (Nervous laughing) ...Have a nice day. (Speedwalks away)

Favorite Moments in Film

So I decided to start a list (God I love lists) of my favorite scenes from film. It could be something that really touched me in an emotionally transcendent way, an amazing sequence of dialogue, or a bunch of cool shit blowing up. It's all up in the air here. To start it off, one of my favorite scenes ever, the tango from Scent of a Woman.

Wii Play, Wii Drink

I already know 5 people who will buy this. Not good.

Musings

Why does MySpace seem so complicated to setup yet every idiot and (stupid) rapist out there has such an intricately complex page?

Do people who bought PT Cruisers when they first came out just feel really bad now?

Neil Diamond is surprisingly handsome.

I have a pretty good feeling that Chinese Democracy is coming out this year.

Where the hell does everyone find the uber-indie music they put on their Myspace page?

I think I'll apply for the next round of Hell's Kitchen.

How dare that girl get angry at me for staring at her ass. I just wanted to know if it said "Juice" or "Juicy," it was too scrunched to tell.

What kind of people buy tarantulas on Ebay?

Wednesdays with Oliver

Oliver: (Looking at a charge slip) Dude, look at this guy's signature. It's like he's retarded or something!

Me: He has cerebral palsy, and he's one of our best customers.

Oliver: He has cereal palms? Does that mean he can't write good?